going.

i am endeavouring to engage in the practice of lent. it is a season that speaks deeply to me. it is a time that i have often been blessed by extended bible study, prayer, and reflection. it is my sincere hope that this season is also fruitful as i meditate on the significance of christ's sacrifice and the ultimate celebration in the christian year - easter. i am hoping to post a reflection daily on my lent page, also found on the header above. on wednesdays i'll be linking up with walk with him wednesdays on a holy experience. i invite you to join me. 

lent 22. 

isaiah 6

8 Then I heard the Lord asking, “Whom should I send as a messenger to this people? Who will go for us?” I said, “Here I am. Send me.” isaiah 6:8

as a child and teenager attending christian summer camp i sang the song 'here i am lord' no less than a few hundred times. it was a tried and true favourite of most staff members, and many campers. it was the perfect speed for communion time on a sunday night, with the lights low and small faces lit up by flickering candlelight. in the bible we see again and again as the lord calls out and asks who can i send? and time and again we see people say - send me, god.

the chorus of the song reads:

here i am, lord. is it i, lord?
i have heard you calling in the night.
i will go lord, if you lead me,
i will hold your people in my heart.

i remember singing that song with enormous conviction as a teenager, but not really appreciating what it could mean, what i was committing myself to. at the time i was probably thinking it meant that i might go and work in a developing nation, that i needed to study to do so. i was probably thinking it had something to do with where i was going to study. and one night particularly i can remember singing the song, sitting cross-legged on the worn wooden floor of the camp chapel, my back against an old bench, the others leading worship with me taking harmonies, i can remember feeling very much like i was in that space that summer to love on the teenagers i was working with, to hold them in my heart.

and so i suppose what i've now realised years later. is that going sometimes means 'going' i did work in a developing country and study a subject that was related. i've also lived and worked abroad for the majority of my adult life. but, i've put down roots, i've made friends and god has blessed me with a great and loving community. a community that is filled with people, who's joys and sadnesses are my great gain to share. i am still learning how to hold them in my heart. what i've realised is that we are part of an apostolic church, a church that is sent into the world to preach the good news of the cross. and sometimes going, means staying right where you are.

wedding one.

we are so blessed to be in a season of weddings. friends galore are getting married, committing themselves to serving god together and looking to raise faithful families - and it is such a joy to be part of the journey. a week or so ago, one of our dearest wed his perfect helper. we were thrilled to attend - le boy was an usher (and lookin' good in a morning suit). wedding one of 2011...

fascinated.

the lovely ladies

sighting his bride.

it was a wedding filled with emotion and joy, centred on the gospel and resounding in praise for the one who made them for each other. it was pure joy to worship him - who brings all good things in his time.

married.

fuzzy - but look at that train!

flower transportation.

kelley this is for you. i'm to tell you it was dyed to match your dress.

mr & mrs w-p - we pray for many, many years of joy-filled, spirit-led marriage. thanks for letting us share the day with you!

forgetting the past.

i am endeavouring to engage in the practice of lent. it is a season that speaks deeply to me. it is a time that i have often been blessed by extended bible study, prayer, and reflection. it is my sincere hope that this season is also fruitful as i meditate on the significance of christ's sacrifice and the ultimate celebration in the christian year - easter. i am hoping to post a reflection daily on my lent page, also found on the header above. on wednesdays i'll be linking up with walk with him wednesdays on a holy experience. i invite you to join me.

lent 15.

phil 3:12-21 & 4

13 ...but I focus on this one thing: Forgetting the past and looking forward to what lies ahead Phil 3:13

 
 forgetting the past. whew. i struggle with this one. i struggle with remembering that god has already forgotten - that he has removed our transgressions from us as far away as the east is from the west. i struggle to remember to look ahead.

confession: i can be incredibly myopic.  i can focus on exactly what is in front of me and ever better i can focus on what i have done. mainly, what i have done wrong. but slowly and surely i am getting better. i am looking forward. i am taking my thoughts captive to my saviour and asking him to fill my mind with his thoughts.

i *know* he has wiped clean my slate of sin, i am facing his glory with joyful expectation.


prayer:
train my eyes on you alone jesus. help me, help me, help me. amen and amen and amen.

sprung.

spring has made its way to london! i could not be happier. i haven't worn my winter coat since last week - i'm a canadian girl at heart you know, and once the temps ease into double digits i pull out the spring wardrobe! that being said, i'm dressed in black today...haha.but it's a spring black?

evidence of spring: 

i ate lunch outside today - listening to a radiolab podcast and reading my newest how-to - organised simplicity...i'm liking it. mainly i'm liking dreaming about setting up a home with le boy.

and a taste of the wedding extravagnza pictures i've got waiting for upload...

me in a facinator:

yes, that's me in my bathroom mirror. the thingy on my head is a fascinator. wikipedia defines them as: a delicate, slightly-to-very frivolous head decoration...i just think they're fascinating! it was a hats and morning suits wedding...yes, we do things like that in england!

engagement.

we were so blessed a few weeks ago when we gathered our nearest and dearest here in london and celebrated what we consider to be our greatest blessing. it is an astounding thing - to look across a room and think 'they are here for me...' it is ever more astounding when this girl, who wondered when it would be her time, realises that it's all because the one for whom she is purposed, has found her. the grace of our lord is never-ending.

immense thanks to all who came, particularly marvellous who travelled an ocean to be with us. my mama is gold.

big thanks to our friend, the very talented mr venz - we will treasure these shots...

a happy couple.

marvellous.

 

the best man.

 

my lovely ladies.

roommates.

 

i want you!

hunger.

i am endeavouring to engage in the practice of lent. it is a season that speaks deeply to me. it is a time that i have often been blessed by extended bible study, prayer, and reflection. it is my sincere hope that this season is also fruitful as i meditate on the significance of christ's sacrifice and the ultimate celebration in the christian year - easter. i am hoping to post a reflection daily on my lent page, also found on the header above. on wednesdays i'll be linking up with walk with him wednesdays on a holy experience. i invite you to join me.

lent 8. 

deuteronomy 8:3 & psalm 51:17

3 He put you through hard times. He made you go hungry. Then he fed you with manna, something neither you nor your parents knew anything about, so you would learn that men and women don’t live by bread only; we live by every word that comes from God’s mouth. Deut 8:3

he put you through hard times. my god puts me through hard times? i have a feeling this is one of the hardest things to grasp as a christian. why would the lord, who does all things for good, allow bad? i know that it's not because he likes to see his children suffer or because he enjoys the bad. i know that it's not because it's his preferred way of teaching. but sometimes, it's his only way of teaching. sometimes we need to go hungry, we need to be starved. 

hunger is a good thing. it signals when we need to feed ourselves again. it's necessary to ensure that we get the nourishment we need to live out our daily lives. i have never 'starved' for food. and i cannot imagine the desperation that overtakes your life when food is scarce, or difficult to find, or you are unable to pay for it. but i have been in starved spiritually. three years ago i was in the most lenten place i've ever encountered. it was a desert. i was deeply lost in a wilderness and all the things i normally used to feed myself - my parents, my friends, school, work - were stripped away from me. it was a desert. it was barren. and it was HARD. i felt that i was being brought to the edge of myself. i had been finding my identity in the things i done - my accomplishments in education and work, my fun friends who wanted to be friends with me, my family who was so proud of what i'd completed in a short time. but, when i was stripped bare - i also was forced to depend only on the SOURCE of all good things. how can this be good, i asked? 

and so like the israelites - i learned that i didn't live on bread alone - that who i was, was not defined by my accomplishments, my job, my education, my friends or even my family. who i was, who i am, is fully and wholly defined by my status as daughter of the king. that my 'good' works were nothing, that i depended solely on the grace of my abba-father. who, true to his word, stooped down and listened to my prayers, who bound me up and carried me in those deepest of dark moments, who sent helpers to love me at my most unlovable, who was working all of this for good. 

i don't doubt his goodness in the midst of that desert. and while it was a hard road and a time of complete bewilderment - i know that going hungry was the only way.  

prayer: 
thank you jesus for your rescue. thank you for listening to my prayers, for binding me up in your love and for showing me your ultimate goodness. lord, if the only way is for hunger, then make me hungry. teach me to depend on you alone. help me to trust in your way. remind me to turn to you again and again. amen. 

weekend - chapter one.

this weekend held a huge amount of promise and boy did it deliver!

after a week of insane busy-ness, a low-key friday was welcomed. steak and potatoes for dinner (yes twice in a row, that's just how we roll aka there was steak in the freezer and i'm too lazy to think of anything else!) low-key friday was also important because saturday was going to be a SATURDAY of epic proportions. our very good friends were married in a glorious and glory-filled wedding, which deserves its own post and will get one...but suffice it to say there were morning suits, fascinators and it was the height of british-styling. i know, you're excited...

consequently, sunday involved sleeping in, brunching at brew, the best cafe in southwest london, sleeping on the couch and taking in a movie.

we saw the company men

in my opinion, it was poignant and thoughtful and insightful. it's a great discourse on what happens when a person's identity and self-worth and hope are all tied up in their jobs and their salary and what people think about them. a fantastic critique of how business answers first to share-holders and a look at really how close to the edge most people live. the movie was particularly timely for us as we've just started watching a series of sermons on lifechurch.tv by dave ramsey, and 'total money makeover' came in the mail on friday...

tonight marvellous and the barton boy are in town, and i've got an physio appointment to begin my knee rehab!